The Difference Between “Hard” and “Soft” Self-Care

When people think of self-care, I believe they often get caught up in visions of K-beauty inspired sheet masks, long luxurious bubble baths with Lush products, and naps (my personal favorite). And while it is true that these acts fall under the self-care category, they are what I call “soft” self-care.

When people think of self-care, I believe they often get caught up in visions of K-beauty inspired sheet masks, long luxurious bubble baths with Lush products, and naps (my personal favorite). And while it is true that these acts fall under the self-care category, they are what I call “soft” self-care.

Soft self-care is typically deemed as the easy stuff. This is where you may schedule out the time to meditate, pour yourself a glass of wine, or go to the gym. Generally, these are things that we want to do, but normally can find time in our schedule for them, so when we do get to them they are a treat. Which brings me to “hard” self-care. We don’t necessarily want to do “hard things,” like balance a checkbook, but we have to.

Now, before I get more into this, some of you might take issue with hard self-care not actually being self-care. After all, a lot of people use self-care as an escape mechanism. But here’s the thing: creating a monthly budget, paying bills, purchasing a security system, while they can be stress inducing at the moment, will make you feel better in the long run. Don’t believe me? Try it! By creating a monthly budget, sure you’re subjecting yourself to numbers and organizing, but in the long run, you will thank yourself for not buying that very expensive skincare because you can comfortably pay for rent while putting some money away in savings. You’re saving yourself from stress and providing yourself with security. Translation: self-care.

Hard self-care doesn’t typically fall under the category of fun. In fact, I would have agreed a few months ago that what I now classify as hard self-care is not self-care at all. In an earlier blog, I mentioned that, “Self-care is any activity that is done deliberately in order to care for your mental, emotional, and physical health.” Yet, after coming across this amazing infographic from BlessingManifesting.com, I understand self-care to also encompass the social, spiritual, personal, financial, space, and work categories as well.

The thing is, self-care is more complex than what we typically give it credit for. Therefore, is not just skincare, prayer, or exerciser – it is also, practicing a healthful work-life balance, educating yourself, and money management. Friends, self-care is any activity that is done deliberately in order to care for yourself.